Delusive, It is to me

Sunday, December 31, 2006

on the last day of the year
oh what a wonderful start: a verbal trashing from my mother
woot!

this is another reminder why i have to continously save money to get out
just verbal attacks are hard to take in
and the limit is reaching

for those who have siblings of only the same sex or have only one sibling that is the opposite sex, or you're the oldest, at this moment, i can only say and think how easy you have it.
you don't have to face the expectations to be something like your older sibling nor something that you are not.

well, now to my mom, even i am dissappointed that i'm not borned a guy.
even i wished that you decide to abort me before i was borned if my life was to end up this way. all the tears, frustrations that no matter what i do, how hard try, you will only see and remember the flaws

if i were to be borned a guy, then, everytime you're far away from home, when i do the laundry, it will not be seen as just my supposed duty as a daughter but it would be seen as what a good kid i am.

unforgettable memories deep inside me.
wish that it would never be erased
as i would like to keep our memories
with our happy moments forever.